So this week or month has been so crazy for me. I must be feeling some type of way. My dreams have been so weird sometimes I am afraid to sleep. Outside of my dreams I find myself connecting and feeling for people so easily and not in a “fallen” or crush type way but in a pure I CARE type of way. I’m not too sure why I have been feeling this way but I have been so sensitive to people more than ever. I feel like I’m pouring my heart out for everyone and not in a sense that I’m going to get trampled over but in a sense that…I’m caring for all of these people even complete strangers or people who probably don’t think twice about me and I don’t even care for myself that much.
I mean if someone were to walk up to me and ask me for help and its in my ability to help them, I’ll help them and then some. Like the other day I was in Walmart shopping for some beads and material because I make jewelry and this woman stopped next to me. Mind you for about 10 minutes she had been arguing with her probably…5 or 6 year old child in the other aisle, to “act right” as if she couldn’t handle him. She was very loud and I actually began to get annoyed. So she comes into my aisle, looks around then looks into my cart and see’s I have jewelry supply in it so she asks me,”What do I need to make earrings?” So I told her, showed her and even picked out what she needed…gave her some websites she could go to online and what to find to create the jewelry…I even ended up telling her how to make bracelets and necklaces lol.
I don’t mind helping people out at all. Its what i do, its what I love to do and it comes natural. I just feel as though I don’t have a balance on it. Right now its loose, sloppy and all over the place. Being the Virgo that I am…I beat myself up a lot abut it and I’m trying to learn ways to take my negative thoughts toward myself and look at the light in the situations that occur in my life. I just really wish I had some guidance or someone to give me some hints or tips…but you know there are some things you just have to figure out on your own.