The Dynamic of my family
My main family is my mother..sometimes my sister. All of my “other” family is on my Dad’s side and they’re what I like to call “Drama Thrivers”…they can’t live without drama. When I was a kid I was around them a lot but that was because my parents were married and even when they got divorced my dad still was around..when he started getting too busy with work and working on getting married again, I started to stay home more and stopped hanging around them including my grandparents. Everyone my grandmothers neighborhood grew up or moved away so there were no other kids or teens to play with…family members like cousins that aren’t really cousins…you never saw them accept for in church and when everyone started going to a different church and I stopped…it just ended there. So fast forward through my teen years I only saw my family maybe 20 times out of the year….Actually I’m going to explain the dynamic of my dad’s side of the family from my point of view, my dad excluded because he moved to get away from the drama.
Grandma: Very religious, assistant pastor, talks about everyone especially family members, uses the word of God to “smite” everyone, blames every negative thing on the devil, thinks she is always right, loves her grandchildren (my 2 cousins) and still rants about how my grandfather’s, mother and his daughter (never got a paternity test) treated her, even after my great grandmother died and so has my grandfather…she still rants about how badly she treated her, she constantly contradicts herself saying one thing then saying something totally different, always yelled at my grandpa when he was alive, and still yells, complains about her children all the time but supports them even when they ask for money.
Grandpa: Deceased. Was VERY VERY patient especially with my grandma, quiet, smart, when he spoke sometimes he sounded like a jerk but it was the truth, spoiled my grandma, never was apart of the drama.
Uncle: Always thinks he is right, refers to black people that he looks down on as Negroes and niggers without even realizing how easily someone of the other race will call him the same thing, openly gay and has made it apparent by introducing his boyfriends but has never discussed it or admitted it verbally.
1st Aunt: Got married a 2nd time but faster just to be disappointed after everyone warned her to move slow, Very envious, does things to start drama, likes drama..for example I was late for one of my cousins parties and she kept blowing up my cellphone, so I didn’t answer. Knowing what type of person she is before I arrived at the party I put my cellphone on vibrate because I had a feeling she would try to call my cell phone when I arrived there to see how loud it was and if I could hear it. Wouldn’t you know she does that exact same thing I thought she would do and I watched her do it and look stupid. Anyway growing up we used to be very close, I thought she was awesome, she smoked and I wanted to smoke…even when she didnt have money I wanted to be around her until I realized what type of person she was. She talks very negatively and will try to bring down anyone with or around her, stresses herself out when the solution is right in front of her. I stopped hanging around her when she began to talk about my mother and I told her I didn’t want to participate in that.
Oddly enough my mother and sister say I’m just like her…probably because I have a “no bullsht” attitude most of the time and keep to myself.
2nd Aunt: To be honest I never liked her even when I was younger. She is exactly like my sister minus the hoarder syndrome. She is very inconsiderate, always late to things then when she arrives she acts as though she was early, never takes care of her kids and if you tell her she doesn’t, she gets offended to high heaven, likes to act as though she does alot and has a lot of money, HAD a lot of money but blew it all on shopping at Marshalls, has a secret life…which is why she brushes her kids off on my grandmother, claims she has a lot to do when she has no job and only takes 2 college courses, lies about simple things, likes to put others down without realizing it, very loud but very well educated when it comes to school and juicing “the system”, likes to experiment with food that she cooks, talks the talk but doesn’t walk the walk, makes promises that she has no intent of keeping, calls her children fat infront of their faces. One of them even said they wanted to go on a diet and their not even in their teens yet. When my grandmother is out of town, she likes toirritate other people and throw her kids off on them, calls/arrives unexpectedly.
1st Cousin: 2nd aunts child. Not even a teen yet and causing drama, family claims she has a “disability” but she has the smarts to be able to steal and ask me in public infront of 10 people, “Jazzie, its that your real hair?” After we discussed that it wasn’t prior to that. Lies, always in her own world, very smart, talks a lot, always in trouble, far from dumb but easy to catch in a lie, always repeats what my grandmother or someone else has said around or to her.
2nd Cousin: 2nd aunts child, 1st cousins sister, very smart, spoiled, overlooked and assumed to be trusted because she is smart, sneaky, just as bad as her sister, gets away with a lot of stuff because she is quiet and acts as if she has sense compared to her sister.
So thats what I see from my family. I know it sounds very negative but thats how I honestly view them. I’ll be writing more about why I feel that way…toward them or random things later on in the week. This semester is coming to an end so I might be writing less seeing the fact that I need to study.